MumuInc

Fat ugly bitch trying to be cryptic: What’s wrong with me?
Patronizing grandma of fat ugly bitch: There’s nothing wrong with you, peaches!
Mean pretty whore: You’re fat and ugly, that’s what.
Random normal person reading this exchange: (thinking to himself) Fat ugly bitch needs to get off the webcam. My eyes! My innocent eyes!! (referring to retina-burning profile pic)

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Problematic lady: My PC’s dying omgwtfbbq!
Fat pretentious dickhead: Get a Mac like the rest of us pretentious little shits.
Nonsensical idiot who happened to pass by: lol!
Fat pretentious dickhead: You’ll be so popular if you use a Mac lke the rest of us self-important shits.
Nonsensical idiot who happened to pass by: lol!
Problematic lady: -_-v

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Anyone remembering this beauty?

OMG wtf hyde, why you so hot??

I switched my iPod to some nostalgic jrock today and I realized I really miss L’Arc-en-Ciel! They’re like my first brush with the whole Japanese pop culture, I spent so much of my measly college allowance on collecting their memorabilia, and boy did they open doors to all the hawt jrock bands!

I mean look at this:

And this:

And oooh hyde..!

Oh bonus to cap off my picspam:

 

This reminds of something…

And you know what that means?

Of course not the dumbass Christmas songs played at National Bookstore in a loop ad nauseam. Also not the crowd of ugly decor hogging shelf space at SM. And definitely not the twinkling Christmas lights your neighbors have on that makes your street look like a red light district.

It means…

WISH LIST MAKING OMG!!

Yeah! The commercial whore in me delights in the whole Yule season because that means I get to make up wish lists of stuff people will never get me stuff I will probably get for myself!

And to celebrate this year’s obsession with the beach, summer, bikinis, and a good tan, my 2011 wish list is chockful of (you guessed it!) bronzers!

Candidate #1: Too Faced The Bronzed and the Beautiful – French Riviera Edition

Look, I don’t care if I already have Snow Bunny and Sun Bunny on my other Too Faced palette. I can’t have enough of these awesome make-up palettes from Too Faced. The instruction cards kill too! Plus, who can say no to tinted primer? There’s a reason I’m in love with the Aloha bronzing cream from Etude House.

Candidate #2: Urban Decay Baked Bronzer

Lalalala what’s that you said? Baked bronzers have huge-ass glittery crap that will make me look like a disco ball? I CAN’T HEAR YOU! I really want another good baked whatever shit. I still have all my MSFs from MAC, but they’re all rosy or luminizing, and they’re fun and all. But because this year is the year of the bronzer, I want this bronzer and I must has it NAO!

Candidate #3 (it’s not a bronzer yay!): Too Faced Sweet Dream Makeup Collection

Setsuna showed this to me this morning and I must have it! I know I’m supposed to be over my makeup palette phase (I’ve sold or given most of them away!) but the packaging! It’s teh awesum! This is adorable on just so many levels! Plus, I will get so many new eyeshadows. Not that I need more, but it’s just fun to have them all in a palette. ^___^ I’m heading over to Sephora this weekend to ogle this beauty.

Candidate #4: Urban Decay Naked Palette

Yes, it’s not a bronzer either, but it totally enhances the bronzed look! Just look at this palette. It’s more awesome than awesome! I’ve been stalking this palette at Sephora at ION since like ever! I hope to be able to get it, but seriously, the bronzers take precedence. LOL

Now, I do have a lot of other stuff on my wish list, like a dress from Beberose, a handbag from Samantha Thavasa bikinis (I love ‘em, go away), bustiers from Posh and Pretty, world peace… hey, my life isn’t all commercial whoreness. XD

Now, time to get back to my regularly scheduled crime channel watching. =)

And that’s the result of my polling for blog topics on FB. For starters, let’s clear up why some friends and I, all of whom are totally not bad-looking (sorry to say, I’m cute and you’re not), do not have a night life. And this is really very simple: In the dark, pretty girls and ugly girls all look alike. And in the club with all the strobe lights and disco ball glitter, everyone looks like an LSD nightmare waiting to happen. Don’t trust me? Read this lady’s blog.

Anyway, I have no friends because I’m a snotty girl who’s pretty, and even though I wasn’t a cheerleader you hated back then, I’m that uppity bitch you hate now. Sorry if that hurts your feelings or makes you feel like I’m no fun to go clubbing with. I’m totally not. XD

Now, on to the meat of the topic: who does have a night life these days? I mean, it’s a time of economic depression. People are saving all their pennies for the coming rainy days so to speak. Who has the money and inclination to waste it on booze, flaky girls and sweaty, smelly, hairy men? (OK, that’s a rhetorical question, you manicured yuppie bitches. I know you have money, go away! XD)

No, the hawt ladies who get hit on at clubs all the freaking while these days are the… erm unique chicks. Nose ring? Passe. Slinky dress and smoking makeup? Totally for the colehialas! I’m talking about the straggly-haired gremlins who look like syphilis has taken over the midriff they’re baring! The more exotic, the better! If you’ve got flies hovering over your head then you totally nailed it, girl! That’s the most rawkin‘ accessory of all!

Forget about all the fashion sites saying acid wash jeans are the shittiest denim invention known to man! It’s totally all the rage! Not to mention the psychedelic tie-dye shirt that you hiked up your flat tummy to show off the bling hanging off that little piece of dried placenta your mommy’s doctor forgot to clean off when you were born! Wow, that’s all class there.

Now, now, I’m totally not passive-aggressive blogging about someone I know. That would totally be the kind of mean girl I am. See, there’s all kinds of these exotic belles all over the club circuit! How about those sexy (obese) ladies in tube tops showing off their jigglies (I’m not endowed so I’m obviously ragging on those who are, boohoo!) Um, let’s not forget that there’s also the armpit stretchmarks. They kinda go glowy in the neon lights.

And so, after reading all my passive aggressive whining, your question: What is the right way to dress in the club?

How about not looking like a walking STD? >:D 100% guaranteed that normal people will talk to you at the club, and none of that trailer trash, vomit-eating smelly bald jerks.

Next post: An actual, legitimate make-up tutorial. LULZ

 

Currently, anyway. :p For starters, I’m way into the whole gyaru look (minus the duck-faced pose because, people, that is just ugly!) So this means lots and lots of floral dresses, dainty hairpieces that lacy headbands, loads of mascara, and a nice tan. My tan is natural, so I don’t really need to tan more, except I do, because I also LOVE bikinis! And so, without further ado, my favorite things as of like the last 5 seconds:

• The gyaru maxi romper / dress.

I ordered mine from Minimaos.com, the place to buy all things gyaru online (and not break your head calculating into SGD!) This is a maxi romper, and I haven’t worn this yet, but I have two other similar long pieces that are dresses. One of them I also bought from Minimaos, and the other is some cheapo dress from Bugis Street. By the way, this romper in particular is from Liz Lisa. It’s a little longer than what’s right for my height, so I had to spend another $10 to get it shortened a good 2 inches. However, this is all money well spent because I look awesome in it! So like boo-yah to all the people who say rompers suck coz this is teh cute!!

 

• The gyaru mini (princess) dress

By far, this is my favorite style of all. It’s pretty, dainty, and just the right length for me! The dress on the left with the smaller flowers is kinda lacy cotton with a lace sash. I got that from Aletta in Far East Plaza. It’s a Liz Lisa dress, which you can safely guess, is ridiculously expensive, but for which I was able to get a hefty discount because I’m cute like that! The dress on the right with the bright red flowers is from Snidel (another Japanese brand), purchased online from KandyKayne.com. They don’t have it anymore so too bad for you. :pBoth dresses are so pretty and even though the Snidel dress has tons of lacy petticoats, both dresses are actually quite comfortable to wear! I got away wearing the red roses dress to work on a dress-down Friday and never felt so pretty. Haha. I’m teh ghey. Go away. :p

• The casual summer dress

There’s only one place to get a dress as pretty as this and fits so well: Posh and Pretty Shop! Tin Roque, the shop owner, has a collection out roughly every two or three weeks. I’ve been watching her collections since I started shopping online on Multiply (admittedly this didn’t really start all that long ago as compared to all the other shopping I’ve done on eBay and vPost). Her clothes are whimsical and imaginative, and has the unmistakeable gyaru style that I’m loving! I have never had the inclination initially to shop at her store because she only accepts Western Union and gCash, and I was of the Paypal school of thought. :p But after she opened a preorder of her past collections, I felt I must have at least a few pieces of the dresses (because I’m generally too lazy to get off my ass and hie off to Forever21 to pick out sundresses). Luckily, Setsuna has a gCash account and I sent her the money to be paid for this dress and the bulk of the swimsuits I asked her to get from the Rockwell Bazaar.

Lately, I have placed a second order at Posh and Pretty for corset tops, and thanks to a newly discovered online service that allows me to send money via gCash Remit, I’ve been able to complete this new order without a hitch. Can’t wait for my new pieces to get delivered!

• The swimsuits OMG!

Oh yes! I have been so obsessively collecting swimsuits since I came back from my last long holiday in Cebu. I don’t know, it must have been something about the styles that I saw in Hot Pink! in Cebu, but I just couldn’t have enough of the bikinis from 3 Filipino labels: Soak Swimwear, Cocomo Beachwear and Nudo Swimwear. My current favorite is the Nudo San Carlos bikini pictured above. I’m just too sexy in it XD. I kinda wish Cocomo would add a lot more stylish bikinis like they had earlier this year. And bandeaus! One can never have too many bandeau bikinis! Since Cocomo’s my first (see that hot yellow bikini above? That’s the one I bought in Hot Pink! in Cebu!) I still have a soft spot for this brand, but I haven’t seen all that many inspired pieces from their collection lately. Soak, on the other hand, is always reliably good, tasteful fashion. Right now, though, Nudo is my favorite brand, since they have constant stream of new styles coming out every one or two months, plus the Nudo bikinis have the best price point!

I’m a big fan of Asian designers, Singaporean and Filipino. I just find that they’re so much more imaginative with their pieces than American and European designers. Maybe it’s also the patriotic thing to be to patronize Filipino-made products, but I tell you, I’ve bought swimsuits from Ocho Maeve (Australian, I think) and some other overly expensive American brand, and they just don’t compare. My imported bikinis are more than 5 times the price of a Soak bikini, which is twice as expensive as a Nudo bikini, and these two still trumps the imported bikinis by a long shot.

These three are only some of my recent favorites. I have over thirty swimsuits now and I really think I must go to the beach more often so I can wear these bikinis more often too!

• Frilly, pretty headbands

This all started when I was surfing Multiply looking for other bikini brands apart from Cocomo. I chanced upon Gargantilla Jewelry and Accessories, and it all went downhill from there. XD Cher, the designer and owner of the store, makes the prettiest Greek goddess crown headbands, and browsing through her past collections only makes me love the whole fairy princess style even more! I’ve purchased a lot more than just headbands from her store these days. She also makes beautiful wire jewelry, of which I own quite a bit. I haven’t really had occasions to wear them yet, but when I do, I’m totally going to camwhore like there’s no tomorrow. :p

Now, why oh why can this princess gyaru look not be worn at the office? Working in the banking industry makes me look so BORING! (Fortunately, I remain ever so cute, so boring or not, I still manage to sneak in a bit of personal style whenever I can).

 

I’ve still got a ton of crap to show off: shoes (and lots and lots of them!), bags, makeup… I’m a retail whore, as you can probably tell. I try not to be a brand whore because brands are expensive and cheap stuff can be had if you know where to look. Some of the pieces I’ve shown here were purchased at very reasonable prices, especially if I buy them from Filipino designers. Next time, I’m gonna try to show some of my Singapore dresses, but I don’t really know whether they’re SG designed/made or not. I try to buy from small stores to support small and medium enterprise, though sometimes, Forever21 and Mango are unavoidable. Lulz.

And now, it’s time for me to clean my bathroom. After all, that was the whole reason I’m on leave today. XD

PS. Just thought I’d add that shops I posted here are also my favorites not just because they have awesomesauce stuff to sell me, but also because their service is impeccable. Soak, Cocomo and Nudo are the most awesome swimsuit sellers out there and they make sure you get your orders in 3 days or less if you ordered something that was available on hand.

Cher of Gargantilla and Tin of Posh and Pretty also offer fantastic service and they make sure I’m happy with what I bought, and they also make sure that every subsequent purchase is better than the last. They, as well as the awesome sellers at Minimaos, make sure they provide updates with my orders, which is really why I like buying from them; because the pre-order wait isn’t devoid of updates that I’d wanna go find something else to buy. I’m an impatient person with a very short attention span, so I really appreciate the updates that sellers give me when there’s a waiting period for my order. That makes me anticipate the delivery of my order even more, as opposed to getting all impatient and going out to buy more stuff.

Lastly, the owner of Aletta called me up today to confirm that I was happy with my Liz Lisa purchases, and also to confirm that I was given very good pricing. I’m really touched, because these people run their businesses with a lot of heart, and that’s what’s going to keep me coming back for more.